Mental Health Tips - "Peer Pressure"

The following information is provided from Aegis © 1996 and Methodist Hospital.

LITTLE PEOPLE BIG DECISIONS

PEER PRESSURE:  The pressures associated with growing up present young people with an intimidating environment.  Grades, attractiveness, athletic abilities, popularity, dating - these new concerns characterize the passage from family life into a world largely dominated by peers.  For many young people, this world is a violent and dangerous place: a 1994 government report noted that children and teens are now the most common victims of violence in the United States.  Entry into this turbulent world often occurs during the middle school years, a time when the ultimate goals for many young people are to fit in, be popular and have friend.

POSITIVE PEER PRESSURE:  Friends can have a positive influence on each other by offering emotional support and encouragement and serving as a source of healthy competition.  For example, a young person might feel more comfortable joining a new athletic team if he/she is encouraged by a friend.   Young people learn important lessons from their peers, and friendship provides a setting where young people can practice good values learned at home.  In friendship, the mending ability of an "I'm sorry" becomes clear.  Friends can help each other discover new strengths and talents, and it is largely through the process of experimentation and discovery inherent in friendship that a young person becomes an individual.

NEGATIVE PEER PRESSURE:  Unfortunately, peer pressure can also affect young people negatively, dulling aspirations, limiting talents and encouraging harmful or dangerous activities.  For instance, if an adolescent migrates toward a group that scoffs at good grades, he/she might be less inclined to study or complete homework assignments.  "Fitting in" often translates into smoking cigarettes, drinking, abusing drugs or participating in other unlawful activities, and these types of behavior \can lead to depression, injury or even death.  The most common causes of adolescent death - accidents, suicide and homicide - are often attributed to some form of risk-taking behavior.

EASING THE PRESSURE:  While it is usually a good idea to let adolescents think for themselves, parents can continue to influence their children's attitudes through the example they set and the information they provide. As a parent, you should discuss topics such as drug and alcohol abuse with your children, so that they fully understand the risks associated with these activities. Parental lessons tend to he more effective when they focus on teaching children how to think, rather than what to think.  Kids who know how to draw their own conclusions are often most resistant to peer pressure.

Other ways to help ease the pressure of your child's adolescence include:

• Introducing your child to peer groups outside of school, such as a religious youth group, community sports team or volunteer organization.
• Allowing your child a few harmless rebellions, such as in outward  appearance, while firmly forcing the ground rules.
• Getting to know the parents of your child's friends and establishing similar rules and curfews. An early curfew is much easier for a child to accept when he/she has friends who abide by the same rule. Make sure that your rules - or rules that you feel comfortable with - apply when your child is in another family's home.
• Letting your child know that he/she is loved and appreciated and that the pressures of growing up will eventually lessen.

© 1999 Mental Health America of Hendricks County  All Rights Reserved